Talking in front of a crowd

You would think that my experience being an actor and streaming would give me insight into how to speak in front of other people, but I am not good at it. My mouth can’t follow along what my mind tries to convey. I drift off and meekly touch the topics that I feel passionate about. I constantly apologize for my own existence the entirety of my time in front of crowds.

How do I overcome this? I think I’m just lazy. If I prepare the way I do a monologue, rehearse and practice, I would probably be much better. I also feel like my anxiety overcomes my intent. Maybe I really should just treat this like I would an audition. I used too do vocal warm ups before heading into the room to make sure my vocal instrument is ready to be exercised. Physical warm ups so my body is clutching to itself when I’m trying to express a thought. I just never thought I would find myself in this situation.

I also find myself going last or putting myself at the end of the line. I knew the meeting was supposed to end at 6pm and yet I let myself go at the end, at 5:55pm. They had given us each 5-7 minutes to talk but EVERYONE went over so I felt like it was my responsibility to make up the lack of time. I shouldn’t have put myself under that constraint. That could be part of my preparation.

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